What if you Wrote the Story for your Life?
Figuratively, but almost literally
I had my quarterly revelation the other day. One of those moments where something random triggered an idea and I thought “ah yes, this will be the idea that changes my life.”
It happens at least once a quarter. We’ve already established that I’m a hopeless romantic, and the only thing I might love more than a good day dream is a good idea that could potentially turn the dream into a reality.
This revelation came about while reading Save the Cat! Writes a Novel by Jessica Brody (because, of course I would be reading a book on how to write a novel). This book gives guidance on how to create a story worth telling, how to structure a novel for maximum impact. It really got me thinking about some of the stories I’ve read/seen recently and how these stories follow the concepts from Save the Cat!… Then, I got to thinking about the movie The Holiday (of course) and that got me thinking about Iris’s line “you’re supposed to be the leading lady of your own life for God’s sake!” and that’s when it hit me:
What if I applied these [Save the Cat! Writes a Novel] concepts to my own life?
People constantly joke about doing things in life “for the plot” or “being the author of your own story” or “giving main character energy,”
what if that was actually true? I know that there’s a difference between fiction and reality, but what if you could 🔹write🔹 the story you wanted for your life??? What would that look like???
Hear me out.
The main items we learn about in Save the Cat! Writes a Novel are
the hero (that’s you)
the beats (the plot points)
the genre (the vibe).
When we talk about the hero, there are three main items to consider. “The problem, the goal and the life lesson.” You probably have a problem to solve in your life, a goal, and we always can use a good life lesson. You may not know the answer to all three right now. But you can at least start with your goal and work from there.
Now, side note, I don’t like ‘goals’ in general. I feel they don’t often lead to long term solutions. I think goals are meant for the short term and can be a part of something greater, but just having a random goal doesn’t really accomplish much in the long term. Think of it more as “what are you trying to accomplish in life” “what do you want your legacy to be” “What kind of person do you want to be” (you can read more about identity based habits in James Clear’s book Atomic Habits).
Once you’ve established your mission, you can start to list out your problem(s). Maybe you don’t know all of them yet, maybe you’re in denial, maybe there are problems yet to present themselves. This isn’t about perfection here, it’s about getting started. I also think this would be a good chance to write down all of your strengths as well, we want to keep this positive, and the problems in your life shouldn’t detract from the amazing qualities you already possess.
Once you’ve established the problems/hurdles you want to overcome in life, that’s when you start working towards solving the problems and moving toward your goal. The life lesson will be something you learn along the way (or relearn). Read books, talk to strangers, learn a new skill!!
Once we have the hero’s journey (your journey) identified, then we focus on the beats (plot points). What plot points do you need to have to find your purpose in life? To live out your goal? These don’t have to be big moments. In fact, most of them will likely be small, everyday items. We can’t focus only on the big moments and ignore the in-between. The in-between is where we spend most of our lives, so what if we made the in-between feel more like living and less like waiting? You wouldn’t read a novel that was only one type of action, so why would you want to live your life that way? This is where you find new hobbies, you find ways to squish the negative thoughts, and you block off the easy way out. Watching tv isn’t a hobby. Scrolling social media isn’t a hobby. It’s a break. It’s a comfort. But it isn’t a life.
Now, like any good hero, you’re going to get it wrong sometimes, and you aren’t going to get everything you want all at once. You are going to try and fail and try again. But that’s the key point.. try again. We learn and we grow, just like the hero of a novel. A good novel needs action, and so does your life. Just like a novel, we need the fun, exciting parts of the plot and we also need the deeper/hard work/lessons part of the plot.
Lastly, for the genre. I think the ‘genre’ of your life will be determined by the actions you choose. If you want your life to have a certain vibe, take a look at where you are focusing your energy. Does what you’re doing on a day to day basis match the energy of the life you want to live? If not, maybe it’s time to change the story.